🌺I’ve been deciding whether to post this or not, not because I don’t want to share my journey, but more so because it’s quite a scary thing to be vulnerable and put yourself out there in a way that you’re open to other people’s judgments. But telling our truth is the only way to remove this stigma.
A lot has happened over the last 12 months (too much to write about). These pictures are of now and then, now being heavily pregnant and then having emergency surgery to remove an ectopic pregnancy & rupturing Fallopian tube. It was devastating to be in that situation and we are beyond blessed to be where we are now but the 12 months in between haven’t been easy. It wasn’t so much the loss of the pregnancy that was the hardest thing to cope with it was the crippling anxiety and depression that sank in after Xmas last year. Unwilling to notice it because I was on autopilot trying to be a mother to a young child and running a home, business and a very ordinary life.
I’ve always been told I’m a strong person and no matter what life throws at me I can handle but what that really means is I’m excellent and suppressing feelings and the surgery was the literal straw on the camels back. It completely broke me and I started leaking out trauma everywhere. I was told I was suffering from ptsd not just from this operation but from all previous life events. There was no room left to suppress and keep all the emotions down.
Being someone who hates asking for help from others I decided I needed to, because what I was used to doing was clearly not working. I’ve always been a huge advocate for mental health but I wasn’t giving myself the same respect. So I reached out and started a journey with a cbt therapist which has been nothing but mind blowing and eye opening. I’ve never seen asking for help weak, but I’ve always seen myself asking for help as weak, but now I see it as a superpower. You can move past life’s difficulties, you can come out changed & you can move on. Be a superhero and ask for help, it’s there to be given and there’s no shame in wanting to be a better version of YOU🌺 - 2 hours ago