Haven’t done a #throwbackthursday photo in a while but lately I haven’t felt worth comparing to ☹️ This Whole lockdown eating/stress eating has got me feeling some sort of disillusioned 😑
But I decided I’m going to throw it back to a time in my life where adventures happened because at the moment the biggest adventure I go on is to the shops to pick up the groceries 😭😭
On the left is a picture from a holiday to Portugal back in 2015. I had just finished my science degree and I was stuck at a point of disappointment. I had to repeat exams in order to get the grade I wanted. I had to do an extra year of college to be able to get qualified for all sciences. Then I had to do a two year masters to be able to teach. I was overweight. Constantly comparing myself to my skinny friends. I was unhappy with everything in my life really and it just all felt like I was not doing things quickly enough or good enough. And I look at that photo and I just see someone wanting to hide. I see a baggy shorts. I see my arms covering my tummy. I see a very self conscious girl not wanting to be seen!
Then I look at me on the right. One of my proudest moments on my journey, and it has everything and nothing to do with weight loss at the same time 🤪
Sure you can climb mountains if you have a lot of weight but I never had the courage to climb a mountain or go on that adventure or any other adventure since, WITHOUT losing that weight. Losing my weight gave me freedom and it gave me confidence in myself that I’ve never felt in myself ever before! Sounds cheesy but the weight loss wasn’t just weight! It was losing a whole part of myself that I couldn’t stand 😢
But now, I’m better in mind and in body! I’m not perfect. I don’t want to be. But I’m happier now than I was then. And I’m not letting myself get back there. I promised myself a long time ago that that woman on the right with her arms outstretched ready to receive all of what the new adventures will bring.....I promise she’s here to stay 💜💙
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#slimmingworldinsta - 3 hours ago